USA! USA! USA!

i love you, america!

pickler the butcher is no more...

and the judges apologize to katharine? interesting. they pretty much touched on everything (except the popping buttons and paula passed out drunk at a club) that's been regurgitated by the media the past few days. damage control.

i'm sure we'll see you again soon, kelli.

the top 6 vs. love songs (feat. bocelli & foster)

hmmmm. i'm not quite sure what to think of this week... paula was much more fucked up than usual, which is saying something. she seems to have been coached to speak negatively, but certainly not succinctly.
a while ago i hacked my tivo to add the '30 second commercial skip', but what i really want is a 'paula abdul speaking skip'.
i wonder about their negative comments sometimes. in previous seasons i never really felt like the judges or producers were trying to influence the votes one way or another, but this season, i dunno. sometimes it seems really obvious.

oh, and ryan, if you're worried about running on time, DON'T talk to the butcher before or after she sings. that's where it's getting eaten up. that, and paula trying to put together sentences...

anyway, on with the show -

katharine - "i have nothing"
randy: "i honestly think...it was way to big for you"
paula: "there were pitch problems"
simon: "quite cabaret...you went backwards there"

see, now i don't get what was up with the judges here... yeah, i heard a little pitchiness here and there, but i thought this was great overall. she sexed it up, buttons were popping, and her voice was powerful. not the last time i'd disagree with the judges tonight.

elliot - "a song for you"
randy: "you were the bomb tonight"
paula: "you...moved me" - while sobbing uncontrollably
simon: "that was like a vocal masterclass...it was superb"

this guy is the best male singer on the show. every week he picks a difficult song, and sings it well. this was probably the best performance of the night. he didn't make me cry though - get a fucking grip, paula, you're on national TV.

kelli - "unchained melody"
randy: "you think you butchered that one too, right?"
paula: "i don't see you raising the bar each week"
simon: "there was no heart, no warmth, from your vocal at all"

wow. that fucking sucked. won't matter though, bush sucks and he got re-elected. she should go home... she doesn't have nearly as much talent as any of the others that are left. it makes me sick to say it, but i think she'll be safe again.

paris - "the way we were"
randy: "i liked it"
paula: "you oversang the song a little bit"
simon: "very good vocal"

i love this song, and she did a good job with it. maybe a little too forgettable though? nonetheless, she's awesome.

taylor - "just once"
randy: "it wasn't half as good as the original"
paula: "wasn't my favorite song...you look handsome as heck"
simon: "it was not a winning performance"

it wasn't a winning performance, but i still think he brought it in the end. the band really seems to be overpowering everyone tonight... maybe it's just the mix?

chris - "have you ever really loved a woman"
randy: "amazing"
paula: "loveyouloveyouloveyouloveyouloveyouloveyou love YOU" this chick is fucking insane
simon: "a great performance"

you know, i haven't heard this song in probably ten years or so, and i'm still sick of it. that's how much it was on the radio back in the day (there used to be this thing called a radio - it was like podcasts with commercials and bad music). this was just okay for me, dawg. i'm beginning to find that i don't really like his voice as much as i thought i did. he sounds kinda like a goat when he's holding notes.


my favorites this week were elliot, katharine and paris. i think katharine is gonna get the sympathy votes pickler got last week - plus her dress popped open, and who doesn't want to see that again?!? - she'll be okay.

bottom three - taylor will be there for the first time, along with paris and chris.
paris is going home.

ciao, ace

no surprise there.

big surprise that the butcher wasn't even in the bottom three. that fucking sucks.

the top 7 vs. the standards (feat. rod)

finally. finally. finally.

a good week for pretty much everyone! pretty much...

it was all about the voices this week. the traditional arrangements let the vocals come through loud and clear, and again, pretty much everyone managed to put their own stamp on the song they chose.

chris - "what a wonderful world"
randy: "dude, you just slayed it...it was the bomb"
paula: "you did a fantastic job"
simon: "i have to take a certain amount of credit...a great performance"

i thought this was really good, although his vibrato when he holds a note is a little grating. I love the song and he did a great job on it. He ended up being overshadowed by a few of the other singers tonight, though. (and it wasn't as good as anwar's version)

paris - "these foolish things"
randy: "your greatest night ever...so the bomb"
paula: "if you made an album in this genre it would blow up"
simon: "i thought it was teriffic"

paula was right. she's got the perfect voice for this style of music. randy was right too, her best night so far. and so was simon, she does sound like minnie mouse when she talks...

taylor - "you send me"
randy: "that was hot that was hot that was hot"
paula: "the ending was superb"
simon: "lame cabaret, and then... magic"

finally he belts one out like we know he can! awesome. one of my favorites of the night.

elliot - "it had to be you"
randy: "very very nice...very nice job, baby"
paula: she couldn't manage to put more than a couple words together here, but she was positive
simon: "it was a good vocal...the performance lacked a degree of personality"

i dunno about a lack of personality, but the singing was kickass. i really dig this guys tone, and i think his style came through clearly throughout the song.

kelli - "bewitched, bothered, and bewildered"
randy: "definitely pitchy in spots"
paula: "you got it going on"
simon: "it was a boring song...you could have just done 'bewildered'"

she said it all herself, "ah butchered it". she did. if america decides to judge this on a night by night basis, she's gone. she doesn't deserve any points for knowing she fucked it up, this is a singing competition, and she sang like shit. she hit one of the worst notes an idol has ever hit at this stage of the competiton, and the judges were very easy on her, maybe to stave off sympathy votes? she'll get plenty of those anyway.

ace - "that's all"
randy: "you worked it out in the end...the false is your money"
paula: "this is a magical night...you did great"
simon: "it wasn't bad...a charming performance"

yeah, his falsetto is cool... he should have used it more throughout the entire competition. this was decent, probably one of his best, but if it wasn't for kelli's blunder, there would be no question who was going home tonight. we'll see. his new look reminded my wife of vincent vega. heh heh heh

katharine - "someone to watch over me"
randy: "i loved it...it was excellent"
paula: "you were elegant"
simon: "you made the others look like amateurs...you look like a returning pro"

she could have won the competition with this song. i think i was kinda hypnotized by it... reminded me of when bo sang the a capella song last season - it was a performance that set him apart from the rest of the singers, and i agree with simon, katharine managed to do the same tonight.


I felt katharine was head and shoulders above the rest, with taylor, paris and elliot close behind. i'm not sure what the bottom three will be, or if they're even going to do a bottom three... don't they usually start changing it up about now?

i'd guess elliot, ace and kelli will be in the bottom three. kelli should absolutely go home - you gotta bring it every week - but it'll most likely be ace.

aw shucks, bucky

you were never the best singer, but i honestly think you were the most improved just about every week.

shoulda been ace.

the top 8 vs. queen

bucky - "fat bottomed girls"
randy: "it was nice, man"
paula: "you did a great job"
simon: "quite mediocre"

i really think this guy gets better every week, and i applaud him for the song choice, but i agree with simon, it was mediocre.

ace - "we will rock you"
randy: "a 5 or a 6...just aiight"
paula: "i like what you tried to do"
simon: "a complete and utter mess...i really really really hated that"

again, i agree with simon. terrible. and was the preshow interview culled from the best footage they had with ace and queen? if so, was the part they left out brian may smashing ace over the head with his guitar? they couldn't have made ace look like more of an ass if they tried.
maybe they were trying.
or maybe he's just an ass. it sure seemed that way.
update: or maybe not. brian may speaks about all this...

kelli - bohemian rhapshody
randy: "i was entertained"
paula: "you worked it out"
simon: "i think it worked"

i dunno what was up with the lita ford outfit, but this started off okay. i thought she way lost it (along with her breath) at the end. it wasn't as good as constantine's version. like bucky, i was impressed with the song choice more than the actual performance.

chris - "innuendo"
randy: "you delivered, baby"
paula: "?" - she didn't really say anything coherent here - i think she was positive though
simon: "best believable vocal tonight"

great song, started off strong, but it got screamy, repetitious and boring, i thought. pretty seizure-inducing light show per usual though.

katharine - "who wants to live forever"
randy: "you did a good job all in all"
paula: "you did a great job"
simon: "almost the moment...one of the strongest tonight"

i liked this a lot, she showed some real emotion (the correct emotion - i'm looking at you, paris) and connected with the audience for the first time in a few weeks. one of my favorites of the night.

elliot - "somebody to love"
randy: "i loved you man...i thought it was really, really good"
paula: "the best vocal tonight"
simon: "you pulled it off"

scary song to try and sing (i was afraid we were gonna hear ace try it, after george michaels fucking amazing version from the freddy tribute concert), but he really nailed it. smooth, cool vocal - not trying to be freddy, just singing it like elliot sings it. another of my favorites.

taylor - "crazy little thing called love"
randy: "that was hot"
paula: "breath of fresh air"
simon: "i thought it was ridiculous"

i thought simon's comment was ridiculous. this was, all around, the most professional performance of the night - sans the missed micstand kick - he took a song a ton of idols have done a medicore job of, and sang the hell out of it. my favorite of the night.

paris - "the show must go on"
randy: "yes! you worked it out, baby"
paula: "you are the powerhouse"
simon: "i found it all a little weird"

i agree with simon. look, she has a great voice, but if you're a queen fan, i can't see how you would have enjoyed this. i think this song should have been off-limits. it's a deeply personal song about putting on a strong face while knowing you're in the last stages of life, written and recorded by the band while watching freddy rapidly losing his battle with AIDS.
...and you add some little hair-flip and gospelly "ha ha ha's" in the middle of it?
fuck no.


my favorites, in order, were taylor, elliot and katharine.

my bottom three? ace, bucky, and paris. i don't know if america's bottom three will be the same, but i think either way ace is going home tonight.

bye, mandisa

i could make a joke about the door hitting her ass on the way out, but i'll take the high road.

too bad. she was a better singer than at least bucky and kelli, if not a few more of them. i didn't think she'd be in the top three, but did think she'd make it further than this.

psyched for Queen next week!!! - there's definitely a fat bottomed girl joke here, but i like the air up on this high road.

the top 9 vs. country (feat. the gambler)

i'm gonna reserve my comments 'til the end, 'cause i don't really have much to say.

taylor - "take me home country road"
randy: "just okay"
paula: "just sang it as it is"
simon: "safe, boring, lazy"

mandisa - "any man of mine"
randy: "the last five seconds were great"
paula: "you can sing the phonebook"
simon: "what do you say to that? i mean, what the hell do you say to that?" (this was off camera to randy, but one of the more telling comments of the night)

elliot - "if tomorrow never comes"
randy: "you brought it down...that was hot"
paula: "you are such a breath of fresh air...you're fantastic"
simon: "a bit hesitant...the best so far"

paris - "how do i live without you"
randy: "front part was not good...just aiight for me tonight"
paula: "kind of a struggle for you"
simon: "i thought it was very good"

ace - "tonight i wanna cry"
randy: "really boring for me...that was boring"
paula: "a contemporary nice take on the song"
simon: "it was very good"

kelli - "fancy (don't let me down)"
randy: "i thought it was great"
paula: "this was a great night for you"
simon: "performance was very good"

chris - "making memories of me"
randy: "i really enjoyed it"
paula: "you showed versatility and still showed who you are"
simon: "the audience at home deserve better" (amen, simon.)

katharine - "you bring out the elvis in me"
randy: "you sang it very nice"
paula: "sexy hot cool"
simon: "that song was peculiar"

bucky - "best i ever had"
randy: "it was aiight...good song choice for you"
paula: "you and kelli shined the most"
simon: "it sounded okay to me"

i liked elliot, katharine, and bucky. i'm not a country music fan, but jesus christ, is that the best it has to offer? i know it's not. why taylor didn't go more bluesy is beyond me - it was his worst so far. chris and ace were boring as hell, paris and mandisa both seemed off, and kelli was good, i guess, but i just can't get past her song choices.

if this were the first season of american idol, i don't think there would have been a fifth. i like most of the singers, but the songs they pick? whatthefuck.

bottom three predictions? ace, paris, and mandisa

going home? i dunno, ace? paris? it's hard to guess at this point, especially after a long, boring night when no one really stood out.
i'll say paris.